Tuesday, June 18, 2019

2019 Commencement Address


Good morning/afternoon/evening parents, grandparents, relatives, friends, distinguished guests, and most importantly, Class of 2019!  I’m honored to share in this special day of celebration and accomplishment with you.

For some time, I imagine you have counted the days, weeks, or perhaps even months until the moment you will experience very shortly.  Now, you can countdown the time until you reach the culmination of your high school career in mere minutes.  As is the case when one nears any noteworthy milestone, it is typical to reflect upon the many accomplishments, as well as obstacles that you have faced along the way.  Perhaps your mind has drifted back to when you met your best friend, a favorite memory from homecoming, the nervousness of your first exam, or maybe even further back to lunchtime conversations in middle school, or even stepping onto the bus for the first time in kindergarten.  Parents, I know that undoubtedly you have reminisced as well, shocked at where the time has gone, but bursting with pride at the young men and women your children have become.

Like you, I have reflected on past events that have brought us here today and shaped our journey along the way.  While preparing my remarks, my mind did not go back to an event at one of our schools, but strangely enough, to an email that I received just five days before the start of this school year.  That date was August 31st, and with the author’s permission, I will read a portion of that email to you:

Good morning Dr. Gill,
My name is Gini Bonnell, I live in Richmond, VA, and since the beginning of the year I have been hand-making and giving away "Be Kind" signs and to date have delivered over 850 signs all across the country.  And I am so pleased to report that there are signs up in 239 schools in Virginia!

I just watched the HCPS video and saw one of my signs in it!  I currently have signs in 13 schools in Hanover County plus I have supplied your bus drivers with signs to go on the school buses starting next week (photos attached).  

Wow!  This was and remains such a simple but profoundly beautiful message and positive reminder for us all—be kind!  Ms. Bonnell generously offered to donate additional signs for the remainder of our schools, and as I hope many of you have noticed, we graciously accepted.  Each sign has an accompanying note from Gini that reads, "I started making the ‘Be Kind’ signs as a way to cope with all the negativity and polarizing messages that exist today. What began as a simple sign in my front yard has spread across the country.”  Signs are now on display in schools, businesses, as well as in the front yards of friends and strangers as a way to remind people to simply be kind.  The movement has taken off in ways I’m sure she could not have imagined and, in fact, now her signs can be found literally all over the globe. 

Her two-word message does indeed seem in stark contrast to the divisive times in which we live. Unfortunately, one of the casualties of contemporary society seems to be the ability of individuals who may have opposing views to sit down face-to-face and have a productive dialogue—to take the time to understand those with differing opinions and work despite them for the common good.  It is far easier to point fingers, to shout with the aid of social media, and to point out other people’s flaws while denying our own.

The fact is, though, that while saying “be kind” is relatively easy, actually being kind is far more difficult than other actions prevalent in our culture.  The Random Acts of Kindness website paraphrases Teddy Roosevelt by commenting that kindness is, “doing what you can, where you are, with what you have.”  While an individual act, random or otherwise, should never be devalued, I submit to you that kindness is not a singular event.  Rather, it is a commitment and a way in which you live your life.  The word “doing” in Roosevelt’s definition implies that one who is kind does so not only in words but by sustained actions.

As we celebrate the compilation of thirteen years of your formal education today, it is fair to ask: Where does this lesson on kindness fit into the curriculum you have just completed?  Which Standards of Learning best correlate to kindness?  How does kindness relate to the diploma that will soon rest in your hands? 

During the entirety of this school year, a dedicated group of educators pondered similar questions and built upon work that began last year to create a guiding document entitled, Profile of a Hanover Graduate.  Their goal was to define specifically what your diploma represents.  It, of course, symbolizes the passing of various tests and thousands of hours of school attendance, but we wanted to go further by explicitly stating the knowledge, skills, and abilities that you, as graduates, will possess when you embark on your post-secondary plans.  In short, we want that piece of paper that you have worked so hard for to hold significant meaning.  We want to say to the world that a Hanover County graduate is life-ready!

The document has four overarching domains:
1.    Empowered Learner
2.    Globally Engaged Communicator
3.    Resilient Individual &
4.    Responsible Citizen

Each of these domains includes a series of grade-level-appropriate “I can” statements, such as:
“I can connect, assess, and extract relevant information,” in the empowered learner domain, or “I can use positive coping strategies to address life stressors,” in the resilient individual domain.
The totality of these statements embodies the commitment we are making to go beyond the basic curriculum to ensure the relevance of your education.  Again, however, it is fair to ask, “Where does kindness fit into the domains that we now outwardly say will ensure a successful Hanover County graduate?”

The answer, quite simply, is all of them.  You see, the knowledge that you have gleaned since kindergarten will empower you to make a greater impact in the world.  However, when kindness and knowledge act in unison, you will make a more meaningful impact.  To look at it through Roosevelt’s lens, it allows your “where you are” in life not to simply be a physical place, but rather the potential that you have for influencing those around you.  Similarly, your “what you have” refers not to physical possessions, but the wisdom that you have to impart.  The work you have done that led you here today, your profile as a graduate if you will, is strong and will forever change your impact potential.

As the old saying goes though, it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.  Or, perhaps more accurately, it’s not what you do, it’s how you do it.  Too often, there are those who have good intentions but mistakenly believe that acts of kindness may compromise their stature or even make others question their beliefs when they show kindness to those who may be somehow different from themselves.  Do not be fearful of doing what is right.  I believe that those who are most secure and grounded in their own beliefs are the most willing to be kind to those who have different perspectives than their own.

Similarly, living a life of kindness does not somehow prohibit one from acknowledging the very human emotions of anger, hurt, or loneliness.  Unfortunately, you will continue to experience every one of those emotions, and many more, during your life.  However, kindness is the strength to persevere in a way that makes a positive impact on others, even when we are hurting inside ourselves.  And, by doing good for others, we often experience cathartic healing.

In her book, A Passion for Kindness, Hanover County teacher Tamara Letter discusses her kindness journey, as well as how tragedy and heartache brought her to a crossroads in her life.  She could have remained mired in the hurt, lashed out at the world, or taken a different path.  Fortunately, she chose the latter.  As she explains in her own words, “That’s the beauty of kindness; it doesn’t have boundaries. It isn’t limited to race, religion, gender or location. It can be small. It can be grandiose. It’s a characteristic of the soul, a universal language of the heart. It’s a mindset you either embrace, or you don’t. It’s a choice.”

You do indeed have a choice, graduates, and I implore you today and every day that follows to choose wisely.  You don’t need to undergo a ceremony, make a public profession, or post on Instagram or Snapchat in order to begin.  As Mrs. Letter explains later in her book, “Kindness is being the best version of you every chance you get.”  That’s it—nothing secret or out of the ordinary.  The best version of you is more than adequate to make a tremendous impact in this life.  Your profile as a graduate is strong.  You now have tremendous powers.  Use your powers for good!
Congratulations Class of 2019, I could not be more proud of you.  The world awaits your impact.  Go, and make it a kinder place.